


You Cannot Chain a Lion

by StarllingWrites



Series: Crit Role Narrative Telephone Poems [6]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Poetry, Vomit Mention, narrative telephone, poem, wine mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 10:02:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24967897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarllingWrites/pseuds/StarllingWrites
Summary: Based on Marisha's story from the Narrative Telephone stream on 06/25/2020
Series: Crit Role Narrative Telephone Poems [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1744534
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	You Cannot Chain a Lion

**Author's Note:**

> BOUNDARIES!!

“Why drink like an animal, when you can drink like a king?”  
Without any context, the slogan had a nice ring  
But when Beau saw the slanderous Stassman flier  
She began plotting her revenge, fueled on by ire  
Sure competition was to be expected  
But methods like these were not respected  
Her father told her to ask for the fliers’ removal  
But Beau had a plan that was far more brutal  
While in guise, she arranged to tour the Stassman estate  
And a swig of micothistle extract sealed their fate  
Eleanor Stassman waxed on as Beau bided her time  
Till the tour concluded by their open vat of fresh wine  
The herbs kicked in now and Beau’s last meal was expelled  
“That’s for the Lionett’s, you turd bottlers!” she yelled  
From the haggis-coated room, Beau fled past guard after guard  
Flipping them off knowing the Stassmans were rightfully marred  
While her methods lacked propriety, to her father’s chagrin  
He couldn’t argue the results and had to count this a win  
The next day no flyer for Stassman wine remained  
As they learned the hard way a lion cannot be chained


End file.
